Right Now...

Right now, I am really missing this guy. The man is tying grass around a bouquet of flowers (bogbeans and alaskan cotton to be exact) we picked on our last "lake date". Whenever I visit him in Alaska, there are several "dates" I insist upon, and although they all have different charms (who can say no to a bear date, after all?) lake date is probably my most cherished.

It is a moment for just the two of us to sneak away, paddle the canoe, take some pictures, and relax outside.  Invariably, Oli finds a moment to kick back for a little power nap!

I am going back to visit again in just a few short weeks, and I will be anxiously awaiting the moment when we can slip away to the lake together.

Here's to wildflowers, newly hatched dragonflies, power naps, and Alaskan lakes. Here's to summer, in all its lovely forms.

Making Things Happen

 
It is very easy to get caught up in the details. Worrying over the little bits and pieces, tweaking and perfecting. It is no wonder some things never get done or made at all, but just languish in the back of the closet, simmer in the back of the mind. The fear of doing something only partially, and not up to your own stringent standards often times ends up aborting the project altogether. Does this happen to the rest of you out there?

 Some days I am so overwhelmed by creative ideas, I feel like I might just burst. I scribble tight little phrases and images into a variety of little notebooks I keep around for this purpose, which later are completely indecipherable, even to me. I plot and plan and scheme until my head and my chest ache with possibility.




Then other days, the mere thought of writing or making something new is so exhausting that I simply cannot begin. Fear circles around me and chokes the good right out, swift and merciless, right at the windpipe. I feel like I will never have anything interesting to say again. That I am not an artist in any form, and that to try any of the plans or ideas I have would be to shout out to the world, "I think I am interesting and creative! Look at what I made!" and in doing so, open myself up to rejection and mockery.

Side story about this photo, with a moral. This succulent took a tumble and broke when my boyfriend accidentally knocked it off the table. I was very sad, but in an attempt to save his feelings, I put the top of the plant into a little glass, said "look, it is fine!" and forgot about it. With no planning on my part, the original plant is growing new tiny leaves and the new "baby" plant is thriving on its own. Moral of the story, sometimes you should  just go with it! Good things might happen.

Back to the me being insecure: I realize this is self defeating. I realize that I tend towards grand ideas and intermittent follow through. I want to change. I am trying to start with this post. This post is not a masterpiece. It does not embody every ideal I hold in the back of my heart of what this blog should be. It is just one post, hopefully of many, and it is a step forward. It might not be the perfect, wholly transportive vessel for my inner workings, but it is here. Right out on the internet, for anyone to see.

I hope you like it.